wake 24.1.09

Missed what I planned to do for the ifest, as I spent many days in sickness again. I should be telling myself every morning now, get up and have my breakfast by 9 am, or I will pull my own ears to wake myself up for that purpose. Or ask someone else to do so. Or else, get sick like that again.

More importantly, during the past several days, there is one thing I particularly understood only now. Sorry sis, and thanks too. Thanks partly for your care while I was really unable to do much with that kind of health. Sorry, I just found out, though. And well, it leaves us feeling lifeless, I can relate - it still gets to me now, but remember, others around you will always love you and support you anyways :)

And remember to think of happy theme songs :)

bad luck 14.1.09

There is no such thing as bad luck.

Apelah nasib aku hari ni.

Only bad decisions.

Whatever it is that happens, I don't really see anything happening as bad luck occurring to me.

Just bad thoughts that lead to bad decision-makings.

So in the end, I would rather have good thoughts.

enlightenment 12.1.09

As I go through scenes that are being played in the movie of my life, I feel like I could hear different sound effects. Different theme songs to certain events. Simply put, I sometimes imagine that I hear things. Yeah, I can be stuck in my fantasyland. Even though in reality, they did not happen. It only played in my own head.

In a sudden while I would find myself looking into space. Or putting up a smile or having a chuckle or little laugh. Or moving my head left to right. Or if it was a fun-fun event, I might just abruptly go straight-faced. :O That might mean I just heard (thought) of something really weird. Like really weird.

Any little happening can have its own sound, or song, or thought at its simplest. It can just happen at random.

waking up from sleep. drinking coffee. laughing at pakcik medan's jokes. running in the rain. falling down the stairs. chased by dogs. laptop going berserk. winning an iPhone etc.

Arranging the events, there might be positives and negatives and maybe neutral ones.

But to me, if it is negative, it doesn't mean it must always stay that way the entire time. Certain people are always sticking with the negative attitude, so they complain all the time. I hope I can keep out from this?

I like this. Take out a song that brings a good mood, upbeat feeling into your head that you can remember at the time to blend with the negative-mood event to twist it the other way around. Who knows, as it changes mine, it could change your day into a better one. It goes for me like Switchfoot to John Mayer to Japanese OST to classical music, LoL. Enlightenment, it might show a solution to the problem you're currently dealing with too, out of nowhere, God just shows you the way when you think of the good things :D

It's just like how certain drama won't seem right without certain background songs and sound effects that add up to their fun effects. Like, Gokusen, Nodame and HanaKimi? ^^

senti dan mental 5.1.09

I keep staring into space and wondering lately. I know, when the new semester starts, it will be different for me. Even if it isn't entirely, even if I know life definitely offers things like this once in a while, I can't help it.

Well, I know I am the one who will be the saddest once the moment comes when we separate from each other. Those who go and those who stay. And that's why for a moment it was important for me to get everyone to go to the picnic together but I couldn't make the rest of them go. I know not everything will go the way we always want it to be. Because life has been great with you guys (note: that also means it includes girls) in my life, feels even more nostalgic after last Sunday! Duh, baru first year. Belum ke nak graduate masuk kerja ke ape. Shikata nai desu. I am like this. This is like a period of sentimentalness. Maybe it's a Cancer personality thing. Maybe it will pass in a few days.

Gomen, I'm being sentimental here as always. LoL ^^